I come to my readers, yet again, for enlightenment. Yesterday, during a very casual conversation, it was revealed to me that many middle aged folks are getting married for the sole purpose of sex. I didn't believe it then and I most certainly don't believe it now. I even said, "Anybody over the age of 50 that is getting married based SOLELY on sex is dumb." And I got clobbered. Is it true? Do I need to clean the lens of my rose colored glasses? Is this really happening?
Now before you all give me the definition of the word "Cougar" and tell me about the new show on television, that is NOT what I'm talking about. I'm NOT speaking on older folks who date younger folks. That is NOT what I want help with. I am talking about marrying someone for NO OTHER reason than sex. NOT love, NOT commitment, NOT financial security, NOT anything except SEX.
If this is true, I will be majorly disappointed in my peers. Perhaps I give them more credit than they deserve. I just find it strange that teens are having sex without marriage and their parents are getting married FOR sex. Is there something that I'm missing here?
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Well, I'm with you Jewel...who knew marriage for 'hooking up' only existed. Do these couples live apart and just make daily, biweekly or weekly booty calls? I need more information because something smells a little fishy about this new-fangled trend.
I am "over 50" and I could not imagine getting married for purely sex. Miss it, most definitely, however I am not about to marry so I can have it regularly. Marriage is a much more deeper commitment. And if you marry for sex, that to me means this is a christian decision...then what about the christian commitment for marriage? I suppose there are plenty of marriages that are not based on love (different cultures)so I guess I answered my own question. With elderly HIV raising, perhaps that is the reason... I just know I would not be the one, it is love or I will remain celebate and single!
news to me, let me know when you find the answer. Some older women marry men w/ED so I KNOW sex is not the only reason for them..Putting on my detective hat like Sinfully something in the pudding is not sweet!
Some people marry "solely" for money. Some people marry "solely" for security. Some people marry "solely" for status.
Some people marry "solely" for companionship.
All of these scenarios are found in American culture and have become socially and culturally accepted norms for marital involvement.
As a matter of fact we all know persons who are in these type of marriages.
So, why is it so difficult to believe that sex could be a "sole" basis for a marriage at or beyond the age of 50?
While, I, personally believe that marriage should be a well balanced mixture of things that are important to the marriage couple, I don't find that listing sex as your "sole" basis for marriage at age 50 or beyond to be suspect or unreasonable.
As a matter of fact, I find it encouraging.
I'm from the old school and I would not consider having sex with someone that I did not consider a marriage prospect.
Having said that, I most certainly would not want to spend the rest of my life with someone who I was not "sexually compatible" with.
So, is marrying soley for money, solely for companionship, solely for status, solely for social acceptance, more "honorable" than marrying solely for sex (at age 50 or beyond)?
Consider this if you will, unmarried people (50 and above) have sex all the time without the acceptable moray of marriage, and society does not consider it odd or unacceptable. Yes, your mama, daddy, grandma, and grand daddy are knocking the pictures off the bedroom wall (as unsettling as it may be for you to accept). And, oftentimes, it's for the price of a movie ticket or a half-price off senior meal at the local Mickey D's.
I personally think the sex for marriage thing is much more romantic than some of the current models that we see and live each day.
But, I've always thought and seen things differently.
I just don't see this new trend (if it is new) as a big deal.
Reportedly, with the advent of viagra and other medical options, sexually transmitted diseases among seniors (age 50 and older)are rising at an alarming rate. Perhaps, the idea of having an "in house" sexual partner may be reason enough for some to consider a marriage contract.
Personally, i cannot imagine marrying someone for the sex only, even if the sex is incredible. I mean shoot if i am gonna cook for them and clean, and put up with him sucking his teeth and leaving the toilet seat up i want more than just good sex!